FIFTEEN! + pumpkin muffins

it's kind of hard for me to believe that i'm turning fifteen today.

the big 1-5– the year of the quinceanera (that i am not having).

i mean, it's just another year that i've been alive, in a quite literal sense. 

about 6 hours into fifteen-dom i realize that being fifteen is just like being fourteen. it's not like you're turning thirteen, your first "teen" year; or eighteen, your last "teen" year; and you're not celebrating your sweet sixteen, either. so i ask, what is it then?

fifteen. just fifteen. 

so instead of saying fourteen you say fifteen. that's basically it. you say you're fifteen and that you're a freshman in high school. that's all that you think has changed.

physically.

i don't feel different, i don't look different, i don't sound different, i don't know any different, but i know that i have changed, and will continue to change. and yes, that is both a good thing and a bad thing.

good in the sense that i am becoming more knowledgable, and that there will be more opportunities for me.

bad in the sense that i am actually getting older; physically and mentally, and that i will have to hold more responsibility on my shoulders. but there's no stopping it. there's no stopping any of it. and i have to deal with it.

so to this i say, happy birthday, me.

may this sixteenth year of existence bring you good things.

have a wonderful friday, everyone.

---

(izzy's birthday) pumpkin muffins

makes 12

1.5c spelt flour

1 tsp baking powder

1/4 tsp. baking soda

1 tsp cinnamon

1/2 tsp chinese five spice

1 tsp freshly ground nutmeg

1/2 tsp ground anise

1 (15-oz) can pumpkin puree

1/2c plain greek yogurt (i used 0%)

1 flax egg or egg

3/4c coconut sugar

optional: 1/4c pumpkin seeds + turbinado sugar

01/ preheat oven to 350 degrees F and spray a 12 muffin tin with canola oil

02/ in a medium bowl, sift spelt flour and combine with baking powder, baking soda, cinnamon, five spice, nutmeg, and anise

03/ in a separate, larger bowl, combine pumpkin puree, yogurt, egg, and coconut sugar. make sure it is thoroughly mixed

04/ pour dry ingredients into the wet ingredients

05/ with a spatula, carefully fold ingredients together until just combined. make sure not to over-mix because then the muffins will be dense!

06/ using a ice cream scooper or large spoon, scoop the muffin mixture into individual muffin tins

07/ sprinkle each one with a pinch of pumpkin seeds, and a generous smidgen of turbinado sugar

08/ bake for 22-30 minutes, or until a toothpick comes out clean when entered in the center of the muffin

09/ let cool, then gobble down